A Privileged White Person Saying Something

July 7, 2016September 22, 20171 Comment

(originally published on The Huffington Post)

I am a privileged white woman. I know I’m going to make some people angry with my words. But I have to say something. In a world of finger pointing, a world where we need to be angry that black lives are being mercilessly taken every day, it’s time to acknowledge our white privilege and educate our kids about it. Several people have been anger ranting, or pleading with heavyhearted sorrow on social media. My friend Jessica Rotenberg summed the problem up best when she said, “for the record, police officers are lovely. This isn’t a police problem, teacher problem, or any other problem. It’s a human problem.” Continue reading →

The Moment I Knew My Son Was Different

July 4, 2016August 15, 2016Leave a comment

(originally published on The Huffington Post)

The year was 2010, and my youngest son was 4. I felt that I shouldn’t have to justify why I thought it was okay for him to wear a princess costume whenever he felt like it. But, I found that I often did, if only to placate the masses. Perhaps, I thought, it could even enlighten someone. I thought if I could get just one person to see what is true, what is healthy, and what is good about harmless self-expression, I would be more at peace.

Coincidentally, around the same time that my son was heavily into princess play and dress-up, there was all this controversy going around about little boys who like to dress up in princess costumes. Continue reading →

My Rockstar Boy Wears Twinkle Toe Sneakers

July 4, 2016January 9, 20171 Comment

(originally published on The Huffington Post)

It’s me, the mom who shared this piece that was featured on the front page of HuffPost for a few days: Why I Refuse to Apologize for My Son Wearing a Dress. And earlier, this one, in the Voices section: When Your 4th Grade Son is Called “Gay.” Today was our shoe shopping day. My 10-year-old needed shoes badly, as his big toe had finally pushed through the few strands of fabric that were holding the toe cap together for the past two months. Continue reading →

Why I Refuse to Apologize for My Son Wearing a Dress

July 4, 2016January 9, 20176 Comments

(originally published on The Huffington Post)

Transgender: The American “hot button” du jour. Even as I type this article, Dr. Phil is on the TV in the background, interviewing a man who is sobbing over the pain he feels with his adult son transitioning to female. He feels that “someone has got him;” that “something has come over” his son. He absolutely cannot accept his son as anything other than male.

He is shaking and seething as Dr. Phil says, “We’re going to soon meet ‘Steph’,” (the man’s trans daughter, who wishes to debut as her “authentic self” on national TV). Earlier today, Kathie Lee & Hoda were answering viewer’s questions on gender stereotypes, discussing gender non-specific toys, as if this were the latest politically correct semantics dance, a passing hoopla for which we should get on board if we want to appear “social savvy.”

If I could have one wish granted right now, it would be Continue reading →

When Your 4th Grade Son is Called ‘Gay’

July 4, 2016April 17, 2017Leave a comment

(originally published on The Huffington Post)

I guess it’s the inevitable happening. But I was hoping it wouldn’t. My 9-year-old gender creative son has become acutely aware that most of society thinks a little boy owning stereotypical “girls’ stuff” is inappropriate. Though he boldly chose, and wears to school a backpack matching his personality: a glittery rainbow explosion of kittens, hearts, and cupcakes, in 4^th grade, he is excluded by peers. Almost overnight he has learned the ugly truth about gender stereotypes. In our house, we don’t have “boy toys” or “girl toys.” The understanding for our family of five is that we just have “toys,” and everyone can play. Continue reading →